i reali had to post tis...my fren fr VJ had jus conducted an experiment about consuming alcohols...for those interested can click here to see his post dated 24th July, 2006. dere shows his recordings from the results of his experiment...i strongly urge u guys to read it...be it u r or u r not a drinker...=)

Nature's love, my love
By Alven

Beautiful yet shortlived, the sunset
Vast yet unpredictable, the sea
Alluring yet precarious, the night
Grand yet impassable, the mountains

Once there, and now nothin's left
Instead of accepting, I chose to flee
Desires within, never did die
Like a demon that can't be tame

Blossoming flowers, spring
Scorching sun, summer
Falling leaves, autumn
Frozen lands, winter

Blissful days deemed as dreams
Affections gently grew eager
Hurtful words left the heart broken
Memories like this are forever

inspired during the GEMs class...thus the birth of this poem...u gotta spot the structure of this poem yourself...seems to be broken all over...but there is indeed a structure...enjoy...! =)

i jus dUN gEt it...i keep ponderin and ponderin...

jus came bac fr my family dinner...celebrated my granny's bdae...and it wasnt a happy one...well...at least not for mi...got LOADS of comments on my hairdo...fr my aunts and granny...well...that wasnt so bad...at least i m kinda used to it...BUT it was all my younger cousins that reali pissed mi off...

tinkin bac of the past when i used to take such gd care of them..and now they are of adolescent stage...they totally have NO respect...i m not being childish here to flare my temper at their imaturity...its the way they treat people...certain things aint convenient for mi to say here as it is my aunt's family problems...but the way they deal with the issue is intolerable...they dint
consider bout other people's feelings when they say some things...

haiz...now...i felt like i cant find anyone in my HUGE family to relate to...it jus so happened that my sisters and i are the only ones that belong to the 17 to 21 age group...the rest of my cousins are either too old or too young...after just now...i kinda dread goin to my family gatherings again...

but i still love my family...despite the fact that i dun get to meet them regularly...but i still love them..after all...we hav the same blood runnin in our veins...

another issue that has been botherin mi...i come to realise tt its true that people judge a person by his or her appearance...wats wrong wif spiky and coloured hair...?y is it that you people must stereotype people wif such appearances to be gangsters or the so call 'ah bengs'?

i noe i m not one...and i noe of many other people hu sports such hairstyles and they aint one either...cant we go by the sayin, 'do not judge a book by its cover'...??i m so sick and tired of ppl sayin i m one...it jus the way i like my hair to be...keep the comments to urself and get over with it...

wHoa....seems like i m reali pissed after readin wat i have written...aniwae i feel much better already...and people...i AM reali NOT pessimistic...hahas...its just that...i dun blog about happy incidents...tHAts all...=)

>>>sO neaR, yEt so fAr...<<<

okok...here to get rid of the 'DUST'...its like only 1wk ago since i posted...aint tt long...>.<

were dere anytime when u deem urself as a fool?bet u hav that experience b4...hav been seein myself as a fool recently... in studies, club or friends...i seem to be like a fool...duno y...cant seem to accomplish any task...n it doesnt feel gd...

another reason might be because of my inability to come out with a poem...i've lost my inspiration...or perhaps...its just that i've got nothin' to base my poems on...no concept, no inspiration, no words...

tired...lotsa tests on their way...still haven spend any effort in tryin to understan biostats...osrm...applied micro....seems like i'm still a long way from gettin prepared for the exams...ARGh...

guess i gotta take a break fr the wkend outings, Tuesday club outings and all the movies...time to save $$... save time... and save MYSELf...!!!

>>>a ParT oF mE stiLL craves foR it...<<<

ur passion never forsaken you...as long as you still possess the resolute to do smt that you reali like, you will never be shunned...

this was smt that i learnt thru playin bball...reali enjoyed myself in this sport...its not jus a sport to mi...it meant much much more...its where i can find strength in myself, indulge myself, gain confidence and much much more...

it can distract mi from my other troubles...allow me to take a break from the harsh reality...

sweatin out in bball court playin the game gave mi so much joy...i've had so much memories playin basketball...i had spent so much effort in becomin a better player...its all worth it...felt very letdown to my sp teammates...since the day i decided to choose cls over sp bball, i knew i'm gona ponder over this decision over and over again...guess i saw it comin...nonetheless, its a decision that i had to make...

the many balls that went through the hoop, the many asissts that i dished out, the many blocks that i've made, the many fastbreaks that i've ran, the many steals that i've got, the many turnovers that i had made and the many other things i had done on the court shaped the current me....

>>>mIss tHose DayS...<<

ITALY...won...FRANCE...lost...zidane scored...materazzi scored...zidane headbutted materazzi...wat irony...a row that involved the 2 scorers...toni send the italians into a state of euphoria by sendin in the ball pass barthez...earnin their well-deserved 4th stars on their jersey...the italians reali played well...comin bac into the game after 1-0 down...their very first win in world cup's penalty shootouts...and it got them the most prized possession...

well...guess its another 4years before the guys can go crazy again bout the world cup...=)

fooD bAzAar... pOly 5o... mY riGht knEe... fOr CLS club.... fOr yOu i WiLL.... LeaVe mE aloNe.... pLs tReaT mE liKe a StRanGEr..... fAiLin biOstAtistIcs..... tOning & gYmmIn.... woRld cUp..... i LOve TauHuay..... i nEEd mOre tIme.... nEw LooK.... nEw pERspeCtive... mY paSsion.... sPend mOre tIme wiTh mY famiLy.... toYota VioS......... wIsh sIs suCcesS wIth hEr New Job..... EaRN mOre moNEy.... bE mOre COmmITted..... to hELL wiTh lOve.... bE mOre KnoWledGeble... DBT 2A03 GUys rOx.... gf bf ff...... gibberish........
surreal woRLd.... wIsh sHer a GreaT tiMe iN NS.... lIve LifE to tHE fULLest...

random random random......seems like the way i cHoose to LivE Life wiTH freeDOm...random random random


>>>LeaRNt...and uNderSTood...<<<

JusT mY LuCK...

its been a long long time since i caught such a nice show...might be a little far-fetched...but nothin's wrong with watchin a ridiculous show once in a blue moon...it has an excellent storyline and is filled with funny scenes that u jus cant get enough of...

is it true that u need luck to find the ger or boy of ur dreams...?the one that u yearn for day and nite...is luck an important factor...?the luck of doin the right thing at the right time...?the luck of meetin him or her in the most appropriate places...?is luck the same as fate...?i m not superstitious in nature...but if luck reali plays a huge part in crossin people's fate...how i wish i can hav more of it...

"Why do I need all the luck in the world? I've got you..." (Jake to Ashley)

cool line...like it very much...

>>>wiLlin tO saCriFice aLL of mY luck iN exChange foR yoU...<<<

dRunk...

reali drunk...guess i went beyond my limits last nite at sher hse...duno y i din stop myself...guess i just can't help it...

bac to the old days...where i party out till i die...never goin home...getttin my priorties mixed up...doin stupid stuff...gees...tot i had strayed off that life...but it jus came bac...the urge to be the bad old person...tot its gone...but its never gone...its actualli hidden...hidden for a long long time...deep down in mi...

m i a bad apple...??looks so delicious and juicy on the outside and yet rotten to core in the inside?mayb...mayb i m jus a rotten person...hav always been searchin...searchin myself...searchin for the bad bones, bad genes, bad thoughts and all the other bad stuff...can i ever change for the better....?

hu cARes...i m jus a roTTen appLe...and nobody eats a rotten apple...

>>>feLt the ChanGe...loVin iT...<<<

this few days hav been quite an uncomfortable and dreadful period...mainly becos i LOST my voice after the nonBUdget event...i canot express myself thru talkin...tt sucks...and as if tts not bad enuff...flu n slight fever starts to kick in as well...haiz...wat can be worse!?

well...tts all the bad stuff...at least i TRIED to enjoy myself durin tis period...went DXO...wasnt fantastic...but at least i let off some steam...by dancin...had only one shot of Bourbon...though i told myself not to drink becos of my terrible throat...still...i jus cant resist my fav drink in the club...another plus point is the staRT OF THE WORLD CUP!!!yay...i reali hope tis world cup can bring all my troubles far far away...as they always say...world cup tends to bring the guys' attention away from gals...its been 5days since the kickoff of the first match...and i can proudly say that i hav watched all the matches(well..i did doze off at times...hehes)

now for some serious issues...my buddy jus lost 2 of his family members in period of 1 week...can reali see he is quite affected by it...attended his grandpa's wake...had been reali hard on him tis past wk...goin over to the wake everyday to pray and all the other stuff revolvin around him...hope he can get over it soon...

gettin over certain things seem to be a hard task...and the culprit...memories...its something that would stay...and never be erase...the harder u try...the more difficult its gona get...guess its inevitable for everyone to go through this stage...its jus parts and parcels of life...

life is short...live it well and never regret...!

>>>iT juS keepS cominG...<<<

The story of a boy who tripped and fell in love....

It started when a girl said, " He must be able to make me laugh." That was her answer to the question, 'What qualities must your spouse possessed?' It was this out of its kind answer that made him noticed her.

Gradually, he found himself falling in love with her. He often asked himself what was it that made him go head over heels for her. Was it her charming eyes? Her graceful gestures? Her candid blur look? Or was it the way her lips curled when she pout?

He could not find the answer. Bet he will never know.

Words and poems played a huge part in expressing his feelings for her. Rain and cloud have everlasting love was her name. All clover heavens was what he felt towards her.

He really enjoyed the time spent with her. He never regretted doing all that he had done. For him, it was all worth it.

In his eyes, she was such a special girl. Only the worthy one can have her heart. He was just not the one for her.

He would be lying if he said he was not sad. The truth hurts. But he promised to move on and forget. It is a test for him and time will tell. As the saying goes, time heals all wounds.

He is happy as long as she has found her own happiness...

This entry is dedicated to you...hope this post doesnt seem sad...be assured that all is fine....hahas...i aint a stubborn guy who will try to do things against other ppl's will...i respect ur decision...and of coz...we r still frens no matter wat...hahas...tts all for now...! =)

YOohOo...hellos to anyone readin this...(if there is even any... =P)

aniwae...its been a long since i wrote a decent blog entry...its been poems, songs and all that stuff...even received a complain fr likky...(see the tag...) well...since i got into LOVE, SEX AND POLITICS IN FICTION, MUSIC AND POETRY as my GEMs module...u can't reali Blame it ON mi rite...? =P

seriously...i duno wat to blog about...too many things to write if i were to mention every single stuff...hmmm...guess i will adopt mY evil TWin's way of Bloggin...jus write down random lines...hehes...seems easier...!

i shall write down 10 thoughts that i had todae...(its in chronological order...)

1) WOW....!(it was reali a 'wow' thing)

2) ok...this question is tricky... A or C??

3) YAY...its over...one more to go tml...

4) GEM Lady!!! u r such a *****

5) pLs caLL mi Asap Dr CHIAM...!!

6) Thank you Dr chiam and fairuiz for settlin the GEM issue for mi...

7) ARgh....shuld i sms u...?

8) sO much thinGS tO seTtle...

9) Man....y did u hav to go offline so soon...?! =(

10) tired...ZZzZZzzz

tHAts all FOLks...!gottA get some slp...gd nite...~

>>>jUs cAn't geT enOuGh of yoU...<<<

If i let you go
by Westlife

day after day
time pass away
and I just can't get you off my mind
nobody knows I hide it inside
I keep on searching but i can't find
the courage to show to letting you know
I've never felt so much love before
and once again I'm thinkin' about
takin' the easy way out

but if I let you go
I will never know
what my life would be
holding you close to me
will I ever see
you smiling back at me
oh yeah how will I know
if I let you go

night after night
I hear myself say
why can't this feeling just fade away
there's no one like you
you speak to my heart
it's such a shame we're worlds apart
I'm too shy to ask
I'm too proud to lose
but sooner or later
I've gotta choose
and once again I'm thinkin' about
taking the easy way out

but if I let you go
I will never know
what my life would be holding you close to me
will I ever see
you smiling back at me
oh yeah how will I know
if I let you go

if I let you go, oh baby

oooh once again I'm thinkin' about
takin' the easy way out
but if I let you go
I will never know
what my life would be holding you close to me (close to me)
will I ever see
you smiling back at me oh yeah
how will I know
if I let you go

but if I let you go
I will never know (oh baby)
will I ever see
you smiling back at me oh yeah
How will I know (how will i know)
if I let you go

old song...but a very nice one indeed...kinda expressin my situation?aniwae...so little time to do loads of stuff....gotta squeeze out time to relax myself...haiZ....got a feelin i will jus faint one fine day in sch...but still gotta keep myself upbeat!goGOgO...!!

>>>AlL cloVEr heaveNs...<<

loving someone isn't a complicated task
but you make it so hard that i always have doubts to ask

its been so long, but i am still stuck
hoping that i might still have that little bit of luck

i've got no directions
so i need some assurance...

don't be afraid to be blunt
cause i know i won't be stun

i do not know how long i can bear all this
i just pray all the troubles can be ceased

something is pulling me away
i wish my conviction won't sway

my world seems to be smaller now
and time is devouring me like a fowl

the stars in my night sky never seem to be shining
but i thought i saw one flickering

its beaming with hope
would i have the courage to reach for it...?

that remains a mystery...even to myself...

>>>on my mind...but in my heart...?<<<

i gotta blog tis shit man...its not often when u get locked in ur own hse n you can't go for sch... >.<

yeap...tts the situation i m in right now...n tt explains y i m at home bloggin about tis n not in sch doin my OSRM praC...!!!

woke up tinkin its a nice n beautiful day...but in no more den an hour...it changed...drastically...

well...couldnt find my keys jus when i m tinkin of gettin out of the hse...n no one is at home other den mi...n the funny thing is we got no extra set of keys cos i m already usin the extra set...n its missin nonetheless...so i m stuck at home...called everyone to check...n eventually i found out tt its wif my sis...n she is at work...isnt convenient for her to come bac home to pass mi the keys...so i m stuck at home bloggin...well...her bf gona pass the keys to mi later...still i m gona miss mrs tan's lessons...called her to explain...gotta go for a make up tml mornin...>.<

haiz...this is jus life....freak incidents(can tis be regarded as one...?) like tis one happens...well...guess i jus hav to see it from another optimistic point of view...maybe i might meet wif a fatal accident if i were to go sch as usual todae... =P we never noe...

gotta catch sum slp now...din slp much last nite...since i m at home might as well make gd use of it...=P

>>>LiFe iS so unPredictAble...juS liKe yoU...<<<

jus wana crap now...maybe the following post might make sense to some...or it might not...hu cares...its my blog...=P

18 years, 3 months had passed since the moment i arrived in this peculiar world...i have changed from a cute toddler to a grown man...was wondering to myself...what have i learnt in my life...??

i tried to recall and recollect...images and visions just ran through the back of my head...i got to say...i hav learnt all the knowledge the hard way...be it academic or just simple common sense in everyday life...i learnt it the hard way...nothing in the world is free...tts the one thing that i learnt in my life..

i can't say that i am a good guy...cause i know in some ways i am not...but i m not entirely bad as well...but tts for other people to decide...not me...just hope that ppl i encountered in my life can remember me as the cheerful guy who never seem to show a sad face...

sometimes in life...inevitably u will come to a crossroad ...

u might be walkin smoothly on a path...a path where u thought its going to lead you to a paradise...but at the end of it...its never like what u expected...or frequently...certain things might cause u to stray off the path u were originally walking on...and u ended up walking a path so strange to u...

its not often that i write such stuff...duno y i jus hav tt impulse to write sumting like tt todae...bet its all the stupid emotions...HAIZ...~

>>>you...wAT mOre cAn i aSk fROm yOu...<<

haven posted much for a long time...hav been very busy wif work at juice station and cls events...jus got bac fr ballin...suppose to be workin later...but janice told mi to change shift wif elroy knowin tt i jus had an event in sch ystd...and i willl be workin tml too...

well...tt means i can take a break for the day...but...wat if she will be dere...? arGH...so so confused now...lotsa stufff had happened the past few weeks...i aint sure of my directions now...haiz...doesnt wana tink so much...aniwae...here's my most recent work... aint tt good by any standards but still...it says out wat i wan to say... =))

Whether a sunny or rainy day,
he is always at the cafe drinking his La'tae...
Always at that comfortable cornor,
where he yearn for his love like a nerd...

Loving couples passed by him all day long,
distracting his thoughts about his Rachel Chong...
That's the girl whom he misses very much,
very very very much...

His wandering heart fled to the other side of the city,
where he wishes to see the face he loves like crazy...
And pour out all his thoughts to her,
hoping that would bring them even closer...

His life is black and white wihout her presence.
All he ever wanted was for her to be present,
by his side, sharing the woes and joy of life,
without any sorrow or lies...

WOOhooo....i M BACK fr m'SIA...but leavin for camp tml mornin.... >.<

aniwae...lotsa stuff happened at msia...cant reali rmb all...well....came bac injured...but it was a spectacular injury...shall not say more...wahahhas....i m humble... =P

din come bac in one piece as i promised...sorry bout tt...well...i reali did miss u when i was in msIa...hahas...n u still dun wana tell mi ur ans.... =P

better catch some slp now...doubt i will be slpin much durin the camp...well...tts all for now...tata~

>>>u Are mY FaVouriTe heLLo and mY hARdesT gooDbYe...<<<

hEYs...yea...i m still up this early in the mornin...jus got home after a long long day out...a very happy day though it wasnt very perfect...=P

aniwae...went to caTch bIg mOmmA hSe 2...reali hilarious...a comedy that displays the importance of havin a family...parental love is so so important to the children...(read Dr Spock's book on children care...hehes)...

meet up wif elroy, chanz n co in town after that...was surprised to see leen n mei...asked us if we wanted to go DXO...den i got christine n alyssa askin us to go Zouk...>.<

>>>fAilurE leaDs tO gReater hEigHt...<<<

sLeep...tts the ting on my mind since the start of the hols....

Had been so so SO buSy...wid FOC, Day Tour n bball...trials here n dere....meetin here n dere...geEs...realised i had spent so much time on cLs club tis hols...reali enJoyed it though...

juS came bac fROm the dinner wif my day tour GLs...had a good day for the first game trial for my GLs...we did good...!!spent a hell load of time playin frequency game at Kobayashi...lols...!!

i m reali tired...since i only had 2 hrs of slp for the day...came bac home ard 630am from one fullerton last nite...had fun at babyface...n still gotta rush to sch for the day tour game trial...SHAgGed...~

at least...i m still able to find time to go out on thurs...!!guess its my only chance...since i will be leavin for m'sia on 24th march n FOC will be straight up after tt...reali hope to hav smt good out of it...its been a long time since i last saw u....reali lookin forward to tHurs...! =)

>>>aBsenCe maKes tHe heArt fOnDer...<<<